One year ago today, I had one of the hardest days of my life. I delivered our stillborn son a day shy of 30 weeks. All of the pregnancy books don’t tell you what to do and how to say hello and goodbye at the same time. I am still very thankful for our Midwife, Carol, who helped us walk through each step before we had to go through it.
We made it one year and we will keep making it as the earth goes around the sun. It would be easier if he was here, but soon his brother should be in our arms. (Unless he decides to go overdue by a week or more – which is not my ideal plan).
So even though I am not planning a first birthday party or watching my son crawl/walk around right now, he is always with me and always will be a part of this family.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY PIXEL! I LOVE YOU!
I found this quote on another BLM (Baby Loss Mom) blog and I love the sentiment and it is perfect for me.
“You will lose someone you can’t live without, and your heart will be badly broken, and the bad news is that you never completely get over the loss of your beloved. But this is also the good news. They live forever in your broken heart that doesn’t seal back up. And you come through. It’s like having a broken leg that never heals perfectly—that still hurts when the weather gets cold, but you learn to dance with the limp.”― Anne Lamott